Parking Wars del Norte

As my coworker/friend and I were walking to the parking garage at the El Cerrito del Norte BART station, a woman pulls up along side us in her car and asks where we're parked. Because I was somewhat on-guard after having just been in Oakland, my immediate thought included us being carjacked in space number 1074 of the parking structure. So before I answered her question I asked why she wanted to know. Although I literally said, "why?" it really sounded like, "I'm a fucking snotty-ass bitch, and you have no right to talk to me, so why the fuck do you want to know?" It truly was not intentional at all, even though I had visions of being raped and murdered in my head. It was the kind of why you'd hear from a teenage girl rolling her eyes and twirling her hair around her finger.

The lady responds, "so I can park." Oh, yeah. Duh, I think. "We're on the fourth floor," I say. And as my friend and I are making our way to our vehicle I think about how I didn't mean to sound so rude to the woman. I thought about how painstakingly obvious it was that she just wanted my parking spot. And then I reminisced about my college days. Parking is cutthroat at Sac State, you know.

As we're approaching my truck we see that that woman has caught up to us. She pops her head out of her driver's side window and hollers, "I thought you said the FOURTH FLOOR?!" And I said, "Bitch, it was easier to say the fourth floor than to say we're kind of on the ramp between the third and fourth floors on the southern end of the parking structure." And then we jumped in the truck, locked the doors, and peeled out.

Minus the part where I said something in response. Because I didn't. I figured I ought not pick a fight with someone who I initially thought was going to dismember me and throw my body parts in her trunk. Also, I guess I deserved her equally snotty remark after sounding like a complete asshole myself. I didn't mean to, though. I didn't mean to!



Photo: Source